The Latest Craigslist Ad

One of these days, I'll ask everyone to single out their favorite Craigslist post. Until then, here's this week's funny ad (no corrections to the spelling errors, but I did take the liberty to clean up some of the language).

Eight wheels of stinky cheese (brie) (EAST AUSTIN)
I have eight entire wheels of cheese that are totally stinking up my refrigerator. I'm not sure if this brie is more potent-smelling than usual brie, as I have never before possessed multiple frickin' wheels of any type of cheese at one time. Alls I know is, this is more cheese than I can possibly eat without permanently plugging up my colon, and I'm not about to toss it out while the proverbial (not to mention literal) Kids In China are starving their arses off.

If the idea of receiving funky food from a total stranger seems a little shady to you, I can understand...so as a token of my goodwill, you will not only have my assurance that this stuff is safe to eat, I will also consume some of it before your very eyes if necessary, with my gentleman's word that I am not an illusionist (à la Davids Copperfield & Blaine). You may observe closely as I lovingly chew and swallow a sizable portion of the cheese in question before your very eyes.

And now that this ad has taken on the creepy tone of sexual cheese fetishism, I'm going to wrap it up. But seriously, I have to give this stuff away. Somebody help me out here. As you can see in the photo, the cheese is wrapped in some balsa wood or something, although you cannot see that it's also sealed in plastic, but it is. Also regarding the photo, the bloody mary mix is not part of the deal. (Crackers not included)